Friday, July 20, 2007

ARRGGHHHH!! Chores and Punishment

(Taylor working at the beach)

Why is it that you can get angry and or punish your own child, but the minute someone else does (uncluding your spouse) it upsets you? Does this happen to you too? Let me explain the situation...



Last night as Taylor and I were leaving VBS I called Eddie to tell him I was dropping Taylor off at Beka's for them to leave for the beach in the AM and to see if he'd like to meet me for something to eat. His reply was "When is she coming home to finish this **** yard?" (Her chore for the day that was suppose to be done before she left for the beach) I just handed the phone to her and then the "Yes Sirs" started & the explanation of why one section was not finished ~ she needs his help in this section for some reason (we do have 4 1/2 acres). The phone is then handed back to me. He "I shouldn't let her go to the beach, but that would be punishing Beka." Her, just silent staring out the window. So, I get settled at her friends and head home. By the time I get home I am stewing. I walk in the house, don't say much, drop stuff in the kitchen and head back to the living room where he is laid out on the couch. I believe he knows I'm not happy. After a 1/2 hr. his cell phone rings, he tosses it to me to answer, saying, "it's your daughter." I'm thinking she's calling YOUR cell, she obviously wants to talk to YOU! So, I answer. She asks for her daddy, so I say, "Hold on." and toss the phone back to him. Another "discussion" takes place. He hangs up and proceeds to tell me that this whole grass bit just pisses him off and she shouldn't have gotten to go to the beach, but I'll have her ass when she gets home...football season is coming up." OK, now I have a ton of things flying through my head, but I remember what I've been reading in Power of a Praying Wife....Shut up and pray...knowing when to say something and know when to stay quiet, at least till things settle down. I will have to step in this fall. I mean how long do you punish for not completing ONE chore?? Yes, punish her when she gets home next week...but we're not dragging this out for months.


He has to remember she's a GOOD kid. She's taking almost all Honors courses (going into 10th and taking 11th grade courses), plays HS softball, is very active in church and has worked hard this summer ~ 3 weeks @ church camp as a counselor.


Am I making excuses for her and is her daddy just PMSing???

4 comments:

Jenn said...

Her daddy is just PMSing... :0) If it was truly that punishable of an offense, she could have come home and finished it then, IMO. But then again, I am very upset with my hubby for something very similar... sigh... nobody ever talks about it, but men PMSing sure seems quite a bit worse to me then women PMSing.

Anonymous said...

Lisa.....I think you are right, on many levels; the most important being that the punishment (if there were to be one) should be more in the moment and not left as a threat hanging over her head into her fall activities. Also, it's not as if she TOTALLY dismissed her Daddy's instructions to do the yard work....she did MOST of it; she couldn't complete part of it without help; it is summer and it is HOT; she had pre-existing plans for the beach; I could go on.

As for your response: you did well to not lose your temper. Here's me clapping: {{clap, clap, clap}} Keep up the good work....

Mary Jo said...

Ughhhh... MEN! Lisa, I can relate as I just got back from a nice week at the beach with a very crabby dh. I need to break out the Power of a Praying Wife book and actually read it! ;o)

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